June 2nd, 2011

On this date in 455, the Vandals arrived in Rome.   Yes, the Vandals: the scourge of fifth century Europe, with their penchant for attacking populated cities and their great big cans of spray paint. They would simultaneously raid houses to steal all & sundry, and turn the aqueduct into their own personal message board with incomprehensible yet oddly evocative letter-shapes. In fact, the biggest scandal erupted after one of the Vandals dropped a one-eight-seven on Petronius Maximus. This joke stopped being funny like three sentences ago, didn’t it?  

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The Portland Rum Riot took place on this date in 1855. I’m not sure what that is, but The Portland Rum Riot sure does sound like a modern day big-band group. Ladies aaaand Gentlemen! The Cherry Poppin’ Daddies, the Squirrel Nut Zippers, and The Portland Rum Riot! (cheers, screams, lasers, knavery, &c.)  

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Happy birthday to the Marquis de SadOW THAT HURT!