June 20, 2011

On this date in 1685, the Duke of Monmouth declared himself King of England at Bridgwater. OK, two things: you can just… do that? You can just declare yourself King of England? Seriously? OK. Here goes: 

I’m King of England.

Yup. It worked. Wow, I never thought it was so easy. I know one thing: Charles is gonna be ticked. OH! Topical reference! Bonus point!

And the other thing is, there’s an “e” in Bridgewater, or at least there should be. No, I mean another “e.” That’s right. You got me. We mean, you got us. We’re royal now. Bring us a staff. We have much staving to do.